Monday, September 10, 2007

BREAKING NEWS -- CELL PHONE AMBER ALERT

PLEASE BRING MY BABY BACK!!!!!



This is an emergency. I feel naked and helpless. Can you imagine someone had the audacity and the autocracy to pilfer Addy's phone. The phone that I managed to get as a birthday present from my dad, 5 months after. It happened at the wedding reception on Saturday. I just set the phone down along with my purse and camera to hug and shake someone and when I turned back around, the phone which I had put in the camera case was gone. The camera and the purse fortunately were still there. I was like that's odd, I know I just set the phone down just moments ago. Can what I am thinking really have happened. My friends who were there and another guest helped me look around for it and then I spotted some shady looking dude who didn't look like a guest and had started walking away suspiciously. My friends wen and shook him up a little bit and they gathered that there were two other men who were well dressed that had actually been stalking around for my phone and were talking about stealing it, but they had already left. While I don't buy that from the guy, I can see how that could have happened. See I was busy gossping and texting my friend back and forth. I also think the phone's spirit was also preparing me for the seperation because the whole of last week, I found myself forgetting my phone in the bathroom, in the kitchen, in the radio studio, in someone's office etc. Plus everybody's eyes have been on that phone, admiring it and wishing they had that, and now it's gone. I swear I feel like I have lost a pet of something, because I am always on that bad guy, surfing the net, making notes, 'scheduling'. You know pretending like I am working when really I am sending text messages to Matilda, Ayisola, Ndidi and Singto. Oh and ofcourse I must not forget the messages to the cute blokes too and all the 'H-G-A' and 'C-B-A's' (hot guy alert and cute bloke alert) on your 12 o'clock. AAAAARRRRRRGGGHHHHHH!!!

So this alert is going out to the whole of Lagos. If you are in possession of a cell phone that looks like the above picture -- please look in the text message section. If you see messages that are similar to the above, perhaps you are with my phone. If the names in the contact list are not your friends or have name entries that begin with 'De' please that might just be my phone. Or if you know you did not walk to the shop or market with money you worked for to buy the phone then it aint yours. And this is me just venting because the person who stole the phone probably has never been on the internet. I just need to vent. Anyways if anybody gets any strange call from anybody claiming t be my PA or assistant or some bullshit like that, please hang up o. I wil try to get my number back and if not I will let all who need to know what my new number is. May be you guys can go ahead an email me your numbers or send a message via face book. Please put in the subject line 'MY NUMBER' so that I can search for it within my emails. Meanwhile it appears there are no more 9300i's in Lagos or is theer any where else to get one apart from the Nokia shops, I-cell, Computer Village and Alaba Market. I'll try Mega Plaza this afternoon. (Kai!!! This is where an Aristo/ sugar daddy would have been useful in my life. Why the hell am I buying a phone in this Lagos when there are people getting them for free. See my life) Anyways I am making my way to one babalawo to invoke some 'MAGUN' jazz on the phone. That oughta teach the person not to fap people's things next time.


(Cough) Ehem... if there's anyone feeling generous and would like to replace my phone, I won't mind oh. May be you have a few too many or the one you gave your housegirl or boy is not being fully maximized to its utmost potential, 'plis consider me'. Right now I am eyeing the Nokia E90 below (yes I know o my eyes are big sha) LOL


13 comments:

Atinuke A. said...

Sorry to hear about your phone.
Was at the same wedding.

When I was leaving there was serious commotion around some men who they had caught with phones they had stolen. And the security men were about to rough them up seriously.

Hope you find it. Or better still, hope you get the E90 and all your numbers and stuff back.

Anonymous said...

oooooh tot i'l be first.

Pele dia. but sisi ur eye big no be small o! anyway sha e get one money miss road wey i know. i shall conjure him from the great beyond and he shall get u ur E90. u hia......lol

Dont worry dear u'l get a whole lot more back ok. wont mind giving u my nos too.....he he he he.....

kulutempa said...

i can give you my razr if you want...it is now out of commission since i got my iPhone :-D

on the real, though, sorry about the phone. there's nothing worse than getting robbed, man...may the thief's hands become crooked and bent! (you know say i be mammywater - all my jazz must to happen! i cursed the G this weekend with two things that happened just as i commanded).

Tutsy said...

@ Kulutempa...."May the thief's hand become crooked and bent!".....LMAO...Damn! now thats some serious curse right there.....I'M SCARED OF U...lol

Sorry about ur phone Miss Addy, i know how it feels to be robbed...i had first hand experience when i visited last year....not only did my phone get stolen at the airport (didn't even get the luxury of making it home...lol), my brand new Cannon camera was also stolen as well.... actually my entire purse was lifted...funny it also happened at a wedding reception....Folks need to start utilizing better security agents at these events...or better yet make it a strictly by invitation affair in order to weed out those crashers whose primary mission is to steal at social functions in Lagos.

Hope u find a replacement soon. By the way why is there so much emphasis placed on phone brand??...only in Naija sha!

Anonymous said...

Girl, it must have been hard to have turned that into a joke, but how you go do now? I feel your pain for real, cos i had the same crap happen to me 2 years ago when i visited Nigeria. Mine was worse cos my handbag was stolen and i had two top of the range phones in it, my wallet, IPOD and so much valuable stuff. I was in a shitty mood for days afterwards.
Now, although i still have more than one phone cos of my different nos, i have my most expensive phone insured, Samsung D900. Wait oh, e don nearly reach one year since i buy that phone oo. Shey make i go 419 the insurance people tell dem say my phone don lost, make i kukuma collect new one give you? *wink*. LOL.
It is very well girl. God would give you a better phone. Stay blessed.

Admin UD said...

Oh dear! sorry about your loss (now, that sounds strange)

Anyways, why not go for Nokia N95. That fone is a fcu*** machine. Using it and loving it, comes with 5 megapixel cam (better than most digital camera's)

Anonymous said...

Heya sorry o! Thank God they didn't steal your purse and camera!

Femme said...

i thought MAGUN was only for ones lovers.

Onada - Fashion and Photography said...

pele!! dont worry u'll get a new phone. it'll just be a pain getting all your numbers!!

Unknown said...

pele ooo
hope u get a new one soon...

Adaure Achumba said...

yeah it'll be a miserable effort geting all the numbers back. I got the line back and bought a miserable decoy phone that i am just treating like a step child. May be if I wear a puppy dog face and bitch about the phone SOMEONE or SOME PEOPLE will get the HINT and run to buy me a phone. LOL. At worse I'll steal my dad's N95 and make him think he lost it. He loses his phone every month or two. He's on the 7th one so he won't notice (PLEASE NO BODY SHOULD TELL HIM OF THIS PLAN)

Ms. Catwalq said...

Catwalq International Academie III is here!!!!!

Sorry about ur phone o. have not read the post but seems like u've lost one. pele

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