Sunday, May 14, 2006

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

And Happy Birthday Onyi

Big ups to all the mothers and grandmothers out there. Hope you've called your mother today to let her know how special she is. I am about to buy some $20 phone card to call Nigeria to talk with 'Mama Adaure' and catch up on the latest family saga. Hmh... trust that there is always something going on. Anyways 'Nda Comfo' is the best momma anyone can ask for when she didn't have her koboko in the back of the station wagon. Don't have a recent pix on my computer but this one was taken in my village on our way to church on New Year's day 03. Guess who's the momma. Yep the shortest of the bunch. She's always been since I was 8 except when I was kneeling down with my hands in the air and my eyes closed.

Then my 'first' sister Onyenachi, the 4th one in the bunch turned 22 on the 10th. Yippie!!! I'm so self centered that I only have pictures of mostly myself, so bear with this old pix of Onyi. This was at some 'Village Champions' party like that with my cousins. See when we are in the village with nothing else to do we just decide to have these 'so called parties' more like 'grubbing-and-goofing'. Onyi was showing me the 'galala' dance in 'Police-and-Thief style'. Gosh she is gonna kill me if she sees this. lol.


This was the same day that I nearly got beat up by these two village girls below for taking their pictures. Some of you have heard this story before but let me refresh your memory.

See I saw them walking some 'animals' and I was like 'Who are these babes walking their dogs.' They looked like dalmatians from afar so I was tripping that ah there are some babes in my village o. You know how it is with all sorts of people showing up from 'abroad' and sturvvs. So like a paparazzi I started taking their pix and called my sisters to the balcony to come and see 'babes walking dogs, that since when did people move up like this to be walking dogs in the villa.' You can say living in America had messed with my head. My sister's cracked up so hard. I was still clueless as to why they were laughing until they told me those were no dalmatians that they were black and white spotted goats. Lol. I took another look and lo and behold they were indeed goats, probably on their way to be slaughtered for New Years dinner. By this time it was too late the girls had already spotted me snapping away so they started sparking and came upstairs wanting to sieze my camera. They actually were tugging at the camera hanging around my waist. Na yam. Before the girls knew what hit them, my thuggish ruggish brother, the 3rd one in the bunch (a lil family history) appeared form no where and man handled the girls a bit. He then pissed them off more by using the flash to act like he was taking their pictures and threatened to use it to go and do juju and make 'blood money' ....lol. This was his second time in a row we'd almost got beaten by some villagers. The night before, which was New Years Eve, two village butch looking lesbianish super Falcons type broads attacked us for making some snide remarks about their appearance and the way they were talking. I think I even made matters worse by laughing even more as they were getting angrier. Lol. See me see wahala in Imo State. You can't take pictures and you cannot laugh again. Anyways that's my taking it back story for the day.. YAWN.. sorry if i put you to sleep but I ain't got anything else to write about today. I'll try again later.

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG... you are a great storyteller!!

Nkem said...

Ha ha! You no fit tear race? No dey mess wit villa peeps oh!

Nneka's World said...

Haha!
You mean to tell me you thought the animals in the picture were posh dogs? Haha, you are too funny girl!

Anyway, lovely pics and how is your brother Ejike, tell him i say hi.
Saw him last time i was in Nigeria, but briefly though.

Enuka nko? Tell her i say a big HELLLLLLOOOOO

Adaure Achumba said...

@ anon... ha ha boredom can sometimes bring out the best in us.

@Nkem... tear race ke say weting happen? Dey for try me now. Na my papa get that village. If they had raised one finger on me eh, they would have been descended upon. Don't let me start telling you the story about when one random wanna be village toaster that threw banger next to me because i didn't want to answer him when he 'sisssed' me. lol.

@Nneka... my sister it was quite a hazy day due to harmattan breeze and dust. I honestly thot they were dogs oh and I aint making it up.lol. Eji is fine holding down the forte. I plan to call Nunu soon so I'll pass your hello along.

Anonymous said...

Of course dem go vex now! How u go take person picture without asking now!Dem no know you before oh

Anonymous said...

Of course dem go vex now! How u go take person picture without asking now!Dem no know you before oh

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