Thursday, April 13, 2006

AMERICA'S NEXT TOP CRY BABY

She Also Has Something against Africans

Another episode of ANTM has come an gone, never shying of drama. Today Brooke the girls form Corpus Christy decided to 'wig' out on Nnenna. I guess Nnenna's need tell John what her intentions for him are made her forget say no be im papa get phone. Brooke went into the phone booth and started spitting some unrelated rhymes about how she doesn't understand how Nnenna is a chemist and doesn't understand the concept of a phone. She went further to call my sister a 'bitch'. As Jealousy Parallelogram, like Evi-Edna once said. The bellus did not end there. I guess she became upset because Nnenna is always laughing at her and calling her a cry baby, because she does cry a lot. She went on to say that Nnenna thinks she is so special because she is African and if Africa is so great, then she should go back. AWWWW HEEELLLLLLAAAAA NAAAHHH!!!! That horse face did not just go there. Tell me she did not take it there o. I am surprised Nnenna did not get wind of that, I would like to see her reaction to such foolish statement. But as she rightfully said, does she look like she cares. The babe is safe and very close to winning this thing so all the haters suppose begin carry bag abeg.

So unto the challenge. The black tweedle-Dee and tweedle-dum after Jenny Craig, Richard and Ron Harris came to teach the girls how to 'swirl'. Na wa for job sha. The two grown men decided their goal in life was to be 'swirlers'. To teach people how to turn around in circles...Artistically'. In there very fake and bad cross between a British and wasp accent they proceeded to swirl saliva onto the camera. Since when did height end in 'th'.

Leslie struggled with her stiff high butt through out the show. Tyra said she has a duck butt, I think it is more like a chicken's. I guess no one appreciates her bakassi as much as Nigerian bros probably are.

The challenge was to 'swirl' at a church fashion show and win a diamond ring worth 25k. I think they were unfair to Nnenna by giving her nothing to swirl in. They gave her some mini skirt but gave the rest extra fabric that gave them more flair. Jade and Joanie were the competition in that but much to everyone's chagrin Jade was the better J. Still a self absorbed egotistical maniacical idiot. Far from hating, but by golly does she get on my nerves. Meanwhile, the black girls seem to be dominating on the challenges and picking each other. Wassup with that. Please spread the love.

Another half dry show, but again Nnenna is still safe. After winning last weeks Cover Girl of the Week, she nails her picture down with her mouth full of perfect white and shiny African teeth. Thanks to all those years of using Close-Up toothpaste. But come oh, has any body ever wondered whether the girl gets cold. How come when everybody is wearing sweat shirts, turtle neck and looking 'cold', my African sister decides to bust out wearing singlet/wife-beater. Is it just me wondering that? Anyways, that's all I have for you today, by the way Ms Jay stick to being a runway coach, that crumping thing you did can make a baby cry.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

OMG !! How could one miss the Lisping Twins! LOL. "Heighth", na wa ooo. only in Yankee..

amazed

SSWiwa said...

addy, you have done it again o! that bit about the twins had me using my chair like merry-go-round because laughter will not allow me to sit in one place! meanwhile, that bloody horse of a woman, brooke, needs to either learn how to cry blood or sharrap...talking about Nnenna should go back to africa and she cannot win the competition...so if Nnenna does not win, is it Brooke that will win?? with her jaw like mortar!

tutsy said...

i swear Nne get plenty patience o. If na me that would have been the final episode because i would have stabbed that heifer to death. Imagine telling her to "go back to Africa". She for don bitch-slap her back to her stupid home-town. Yeye country girl we dey feel because she dey on Tv. But i gotta give her props for keeping her cool through all the madness.

DiAmOnD hawk said...

does anyone notice that nnena curtsies each time she accepts something from tyra....even during her audition,when they complimented...she curtsied when she said thank you....just thot it was interesting...nothing wrong with it..

Adaure said...

SO that' what that was. I made a note of that, Nnenna's curtsies, but my handwriting is so bad that I could even read what I wrote. Lol. Yes I noticed that o. She also puts her hand on her face when saying thank you or accepting something and crosses her hands over her chest; either holding her neck or shoulders. Some very interesting observations, quite peculiar.

R said...

A letter to Adaure.

I loooooove your blog. Thanks for the commic relief. Thanks for help controlling the urge to butcher a few oyinbo people. Thanks for putting in words everything I'm thinking but can't express. Thanks for giving me someone to relate to.

odaiche said...

If Nnenna should go back to Africa, Brooke should pack her shege and go back to Ireland or wherever the hell she from. Because like we all know, if you ain't American Indian, this ain't your land. Shoooo.... I was heated, to say the least, over that mindless comment of hers. Sweerie, I'm not too sure that Nnenna "curties", I think she is doing the African greeting thing. Just my 2 cents. Later peoples...Go ANTM!!!

Monef said...

I feel you. They are this close to banning me from televisionwithoutpity.com because i have been vocalising how offended i am on behalf of nne. The best part though is her asking Jade if she looks like she cares!! That is such a naija move through and through...pure class..I'm proud of her. Cos if it was me...I would've cut a bitch!