HAIRY SITUATION

Stuck Between China and Africa

What in the holy high heavens ever possessed me into thinking that I could ever go from this...

TO THIS!!!!!

OR EVEN THIS

TO THIS!!!!

'Git Outta Town....."

So as part of my ' Adaure for the Masses in 06' project which consists of mostly demilitarizing my militant afrocentric personality to a more mass appealing non-threatening and assimilated appearance, I decided to ditch my wigs, give the 'fro a break and 'get a weave.'

Not a bad idea at all... particularly considering the fact that I am going bald, braids are not cool for TV news, I won't get a perm and there are practically no black people who do hair in Santa Maria. I mean what business or clientele can a 'sista' make with only 1 percent of 70,000 people. That's probably just the 'sista' and her sisters, their mother and daughters and sister in-laws. All 10 of them

In reality I have never had a sewn in weave outside of the two that I sewed in my self way back in my house girl days in Charlotte and the one I glued in myself for the pageant. Yes I am a do-it-ya-damn-self kinda girl but today I decided to go and dash money to the peeps at 'Africa World of Braids'. I figured I should just go and try it and get it right. I came armed with the hair style inspiration that I have always wanted since it hit the tv screen and magazine covers last fall. None other than the hairstyle of my dearest icon and biggest role model Oprah Winfrey.

Hello!!!Big mistake!!!! In fact HUGE mistake!!!!

Got the staright hair with the intention of getting it styled and curled. Spent to much on the freaking hair when there was a sale for the same kind of hair for $2.99. After thought, I don't own any heating hair irons so why did I worry about the hair melting when I use curling rods, water, pink oil and holding spray. Then I went to the stylist to get her opinion on what options were available to me especially when putting my really nappy virgin hair in perspective with the hair that I dream to have, Oprah's curls. The lady assured me that I could get the full sew in but need to leave a weft of hair in the front so that it could be flat ironed to match the weave.

Why did I listen to this babe...

Thinking about it, African-American hair when flat ironed gets very silky and straight. And this was what this lady was touting. Stupid me forgot about the 'African' part and believed that my hair could be straightened silky straight to look like the chinese weave without getting a perm. The ladies at 'African World of Braids' can be highly useless at times. Actually that's african hair briaders in general. They forget that they too are also hair consultants and not just braiders. Heck I can briad my hair my freaaing self and probably sew in the darned weave. And considering the fact that I told them that I have never gotten a weave and wasn't sure what it would turn out like. They were more concerned about me dolling out the 100 bucks.

Anyways I went to get the sew-in, but upon finishing and heavily pondering the choice that I had just made, I was like 'Houston We Have a problem'. The lady tried to use her blow dryer to see if she can straighten the littel weft of hair left out. For where. Then I asked her if it was too late to cover all my hair up and she was like yes it's too late. Then I come home to my flat iron and hot-comb, the kind you heat/burn up on the stove. I made another attempt to get my hair bone straight, but it still did not match the weave. In my head I am thinking 'impossicant', there is no way in hell that after spedning this money, that i'll be walking around looking like a new ethnicity...Blackinese, Chinafrican, Negrasian etcetera. Like I went on a journey back to my roots but ended up in China. May be all that Chinese food I eat can account for something.
First thing Wednesday morning, I am skipping the stylist altogether and going straight back to the braidshop to have them fill in the gaps. If I have to carry a poorly constructed weave, I'ld rather do that than have a miniture afro on my fore-head.

Meanwhile...

I have two days left at WTVD before I jet off to 'SoCal'. I am just now starting to get excited about my move, hence the hair-mishap described above. At work today I was just counting the seconds on the clock and being very restless. My head hurt from combing my afroin the morning, my eyes hurt from staring at this damn computer screen, my ears were ringing and had practically gone deaf from listening to those scanners and my tummy was rumbling all day because I was starving. Browsed craigslist for deals on cars. Not having any luck selling mine, perhaps I over estimated its worth. Still waiting on word from Santa. He went to the village and we don't have Money transfer yet.

I am also looking for new set of strategies for my 06 'me' project. Career wise and over all just to improve on me as a person. Tonight's attempt to jump start the plan went 'hair-wire' but that was to be expected because I have always had issues with my hair. It's a 'hairy' long story and I have an essay about that that I'll share in due time. Let's just hope I can fix this horrendous weave situation on my head without any trouble tomorrow... trust african businesses to lack customer service. All I know is that I am returning to my crib tomorrow with a full head of weave, even if it means I have to curl it up myself and pin the curls in place to hide the wack-tracks. Should have gotten Lola to do it for $50 bucks....shooo, she'ld have probably done a better job!!!